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| Duncan Fallowell |
The Diary, which seems to have lost nothing in the paper's transition from paid-for to freebie, relates an amusing tale told by one of the guests, art dealer James Birch. He 'recalled his first encounter with Fallowell, which left an indelible impression. “He went up to my father and asked if he was heterosexual. When he said he was, Duncan kissed him full on the lips. My father nearly fell off his chair.”'
Ah, yes, the event is recalled and I can tell more.
The encounter was at a large sit-down dinner at the Royal College of Art for the late artist and writer Dicky Chopping's retirement. Birch was indeed there with his father. Fallowell went with sometime lover and Britain's first transsexual, April Ashley; and unfortunately he got incredibly drunk. James Birch was wearing a fetching all-white suit and Fallowell pursued him all round the hall with a trembling glass of claret. Birch proved to be too quick for his pursuer - so Fallowell ran off with Muriel Belcher's crutches which she'd parked neatly beside her seat. This had never happened to her before. The filthy-mouthed Colony crone looked panic stricken - 'For God's sake stop that young man!' she wailed as he ran off out of the hall with them.
I am happy to report that when he gallantly returned them to her 10 minutes later she made him an honorary member of the Colony for bravery. And thereafter Fallowell was always called 'Young man' at the Colony, even after her death. Once or twice I heard Ian Board call him 'Young man' when he was 40 - er, some years past now.
Incidentally, in other matters, my friends in the book trade tell me How To Disappear: A Memoir For Misfits sold out before the launch - the warehouse cleaned out - but fortunately his canny publishers Ditto kept a couple of boxes in reserve for the party. They are now rushing to reprint.
To read my review of the book, click here. Worth reading (also!) is Byron Rogers' marvellously batty Spectator review. And to think, Byron used to write Prince Charles' speeches - 'Such big hands,' he is wont to say of his once royal master.
(PS: One minute [interview] with Duncan Fallowell in the Independent.)
Is that the James Birch who took Gilbert & George to China?
ReplyDeleteSomeone is writing a History of the Colony Room
ReplyDeleteYes, Sophie Parkin. I have arranged an interview with the late Muriel.
ReplyDeleteI don't know why you're writing about a bunch of alcoholics. They just end up constipating our NHS hospitals.
ReplyDeleteDitto Press have done a sensational design job on Fallowell's book. I wish some of the press commentators would notice this - they can't all be visually illiterate? or can they?
ReplyDeleteJames Birch is the discoverer of Grayson Perry. Should we be thankful?
ReplyDeleteMonocle (October issue) loves Duncan/Ditto too
ReplyDeleteI agree. I used to review just book covers, they tell you almost everything you need to know about the content - eg Tina Brown's Diana and its hideous shocking pink cover. I could devote 2000 words to DF's book cover. But you know, why should I give everything away for nothing?
ReplyDeleteAnd as to Perry, I realised what a con he is when I saw him licking up to Valentino in the doc film made a few years back. He was being all matey and inappropriate in his Goldie Locks dress. I thought he was goint to whip out his cock at one point.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry but I deplore Monocle and Creme Brulee, the editor.
ReplyDeleteGrayson Perry had a bit of a ding-dong with April Ashley
ReplyDeleteYou must tell more, whoever you are.
ReplyDeleteMr Fallowell can count himself lucky that he had a launch party. A very rare thing, book parties!
ReplyDeleteOh yeah, they had a fling but were never an item
ReplyDeleteI was there and the champagne flowed freely courtesy of Moet - free fizz and anyone can party
ReplyDeleteWhile you're on this subject - has Duncan Fallowell ever done drag? I know he was also a friend of Divine
ReplyDeleteI remember when James Birch used to go around in a bubble car ... don't know why I'm off his guest list though.
ReplyDeleteDicky Chopping! The names of these people! Why don't I ever know someone called Dicky Chopping?
ReplyDeleteCsn't see DF in a frock myself.
ReplyDeleteI'm confused. April Ashley had a fling with Duncan or Grayson, or perhaps both? Is Miss Ashley still alive? I'm very surprised she hasn't popped up yet on Celebrity Big Brother or I'm A Celebrity. I'm sure a new generation of TV morons would love her airs and graces.
ReplyDeleteMr Fallowell once introduced me to someone called Major Donald Neville-Willing
ReplyDeleteApril Ashley lives in Fulham these days
ReplyDeleteYes, I remember James Birch going around in a bubble car. As for the Colony - Muriel Belcher once invited me to join her for a drink at the Colony and even though I ordered an orange juice nobody shouted obscenities at me.
ReplyDeleteJust started reading Fallowell's book. Bloody good
ReplyDeleteMURIEL BELCHER'S CRUTCHES - follow up to EVIL DEAD
ReplyDeleteAnd there was someone called Christopher Boggis-Rolfe in those days
ReplyDeleteMonocle's fun. You're being silly.
ReplyDeleteThis is all very unpredictable. Me like that.
ReplyDeleteLook, you gotta help me. I can't quite get to grips with this. Who is this guy and why is he important? He seems to be everywhere - and nowhere. Is he a cyber droid or what?
ReplyDeleteThe Independent has a very funny thing today about Duncan. Tell him to have another party and invite the Third Man
ReplyDeleteThis man DF is in an abyss, between being up there and not being up there. OW-oooooo.
ReplyDeleteIs this book likely to be translated into Friulano?
ReplyDeleteDear Madame, why are you bothering with Paper Blog? It's very populist whereas you are anti-populist. Just stay as you are in your little ghetto here.
ReplyDeleteI've added a link at the bottom of the post to the Indy's one minute interview with DF.
ReplyDeleteYeah, the Standard's still bloody good
ReplyDeleteHalf way through How to Disappear and loving it. What I don't understand is why there is no author's note or introduction. Nothing about the author in fact. I assume this void will be filled in later editions.
ReplyDeleteIt is a work of literary art published as a work of visual art. It is an art object. No notes, acknowledgments, index, or other paraphernalia. Pure brilliant streamlined experience
ReplyDeleteA muse is not always amusing
ReplyDeleteIf the book is an art object then it should be sold with a stand.
ReplyDeleteJames Birch has an amazing collection of those beautiful little bubble cars, Messerschmitts and so on.
ReplyDeleteA handsome man but always decidedly heterosexual. Duncan should have his gaydar checked.
One should avoid intimations of preciousness.
ReplyDeleteDear M.A.
ReplyDeleteAccording to your Lady horoscope page, I have a spectacular new moon in my sign on Sept 27th. Can you advise me how best to exploit this? I'd hate to miss a cosmic opportunity.
Best wishes, Duncan Fallowell
My dear Duncan,
ReplyDeleteThe likelihood of you missing out on a cosmic opportunity seems very remote to me, and I say this without reference to your natal chart (for which there is no substitute).
Still, any opportunity that takes you into new work territory and/or that causes you to reinvent image and/or that connects you to new joyful persons - all these opportunities (or at least one) should be grabbed greedily and in full expectation. This New Moon's influence may endure for several months.
Thank God I persuaded your publisher to delay publication to September. For now the book may surf upon the lunar tsunami to come!
Right. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteThe Colony went national - you can see it in gutters and shop doorways up and down the country every weekend
ReplyDeleteMr Birch sounds like a nerd.
ReplyDeletehappy birthday, duncan, from your stalker
ReplyDeleteIt's time that Fallowell did a five minute interview
ReplyDelete