Sharon Osbourne - Gervais on the Tarrant episode

I knew about Sharon Osbourne's deranged verbal assault on Chris Tarrant, but Marian Yule - who wrote in - supplies so much excellent colour (I didn't know Louis put Chris up to it) that it would be a waste not to post it here ...

Oddly enough, I was at Ricky Gervais's stand-up show yesterday, where he used his encore to tell a story about Sharon Osbourne's, er, unique approach to other people.

Apparently he was sitting with his girlfriend at the back at the recording of the live final [of The X Factor] for the last series, near Chris Tarrant and his daughter, and chef Aldo Zilli and his wife.

As the show was live, every commercial break was filled with a warm-up man taking questions from the audience to be put to the judges.

Chris Tarrant had apparently colluded with Louis Walsh to get to ask a question. He stood up, and started: "Sharon, you're married to an intelligent, articulate man..."

He got no further because Sharon Osbourne started screeching obscenities, including liberal use of the words 'fuck' and 'cunt' - all this just metres away from horrified families with children. She also threw in something along the lines of "No wonder your wife left you, Chris!"

Poor Chris tried to protest in vain that he wasn't about to take the piss out of Ozzy, while Louis mouthed apologies over Sharon's shoulder. Alas, there was no stopping the termagant's ire until the break ended and the show went back again.

At the next commercial break, Sharon stood up and said: "I'd like to apologise to all the mummies and kiddies out there - but you know what it's like when a loved one is attacked, you're like a tigress, aren't you?"

To Gervais's astonishment - this got a round of applause.

Clearly, as long as Sharon plays the 'I'm a mum under pressure, just like you!' card, she can get away with pretty much anything.