Sunday, March 21, 2010

Dr Brian Cox and the Wonders of a Solar Smile


The latest sexy darling of atheists is particle physicist Dr Brian Cox, former rock star member of the band D:Ream. His current BBC2 show Wonders of the Solar System is wowing the so-called intelligentsia in the UK, for reasons beyond my understanding. It's telling us nothing we haven't heard already: the Sun is awfully hot, Mercury is hot, too, but gets very cold at night, Venus is Earth's carbon alter ego, and there are some helluva storms on Jupiter. True, I hadn't seen some of the pics of Titan's surface, but think of sand and stones and, presto, you have Saturn's Worthing.

What's tickling mental clits and dicks is Cox's ability to smile while talking. This is quite an achievement. Most people who smile while talking are probably planning to kill you; they're loons: but Coxy Babe couldn't drown a kitten. He's a cuddlesome, hard-geeing northerner geek in awe of the universe. His very orgasmic, transferable relish in repeating what his profs taught him at uni alchemises his commonplaces, with that toothy smile. That he sounds like a simpleton while parroting the number of air molecules in a pebble disarms because one knows he's a swot and make no mistake. We need to look down a bit first before we look up.

Cox is a man boy waggling his box of toys at us: he has nothing new to tell us, just a new way - thanks to his talking smile. At public expense he gets to fly at 60,000 ft to admire the dark blue of the sky, to drive over desert sand dunes to show us what Mars is like (air: thin), and he lights Chinese lanterns to demonstrate the effects of hot air. Oh, it rises.

No wonder he's smiling. I'd be laughing in his shoes.

PS:
(The Mail on Sunday columnist Suzanne Moore wrote me on Facebook after I said Cox was like a kid with toys: "Told Brian what you said. He said Tell them from me that they should stick to shaking their jowels and drinking Claret and leave science to the big boys and girls ;-) Oooooh x"

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

Makes a lot more sense than farting among the stars

Anonymous said...

Oh no, Coxy is mine mine mine

Anonymous said...

You must admit he's prettier than Patrick Moore or Carl Sagan but is he as entertaining ?.
Love the put down though! An astronomer and a bitch. How chic.

Madame Arcati said...

Sagan was quite pretty in his time and you felt he was a benevolent alien sent among us to spread the word; a Vulcan who went to finishing school. Moore I imagine has a large cock he's never used. That thought can keep a career afloat.

Kevin Capacious said...

This peach-fluffed popinjay used to be the science monitor on This Morning, turning up to grin a lot whilst telling Fern and Phil how to make peppermints fly high in the sky via a fizzy drink ejaculation. He's a very deep thinker indeed, right up Ms Moore's fuck-me-shoed street.

Madame Arcati said...

Oh he's ambitious is he. I knew my antennae hadn't twitched for nothing.

Roderick Spode said...

He's eerily reminiscent of that Paul Whitehouse character in The Fast Show - the one who says things like, 'Clouds - they're all fluffy and that, and they've got rain and all sorts of cold stuff inside 'em, but they still look nice and dry: BRILLIANT!'

bendowell said...

"Shaking their Jowels"? What a James Blunt. Does he think he's some latter day dyslexic John Lennon as well?
As I say. A See you next Tues
I find the Madame's profile nowt but chiselled.

Madame Arcati said...

Thank you BD. With my pince-nez I could pass for a slightly dotty Israeli assassin in Dubai.

Anonymous said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nptDP35Tb0&NR=1

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Simon said...

Virtually all pop-science is a repackaging of well understood phenomena. You can't make tv about cutting edge particle physics, because the general public don't possess knowledge of the principles upon which that research is built. Cox is genuinely passionate and enthusiastic about science; he is unabashedly 'wowed' by it.

He talks about science like a story teller rather than a conventional scientist, which appeals to "normal" people. There are plenty of people (read: intellectual snobs) who would rather academia remained a sterile fact dump - "I had to appreciate the beauty of physics without someone trying to make it sound like poetry, you should all have to too!" Cynicism abounds, I guess ;)

Madame Arcati said...

To the anonymous commenter whose comment I have rejected: if you're going to write in do try to make some sense even if what you think belongs to Broadmoor. I can cope with that. But I can't cope with irrationality. So when you can explain the link between Cox and the McCanns in comprehensible terms, with your spell-checker turned on, I shall be happy to post your comment.

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Madame Arcati said...

Why thank you Nashville Whatever - insincerity is a vice, you know.