Monday, February 08, 2010

AA Gill: If a rat's worth £2000, what's the value of a shot baboon?


Silly cunt AA Gill strikes a pose

A rat's life has been valued at £2,000. This is ITV's fine for the killing and eating of the rodent on I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here! by famished contestants. The Australian RSPCA explained that the creature suffered unnecessarily for 90 seconds before death. "The animal was killed for a TV show, that's not appropriate," it added. Report.

Quite so. I wonder then how much the Sunday Times TV and food critic AA Gill would have been fined by the Australian RSPCA in similar circumstances. Last year he admitted in one of his wittering restaurant reviews to the killing of a baboon on a Tanzanian jaunt. He shot the beast just to see what it was like to kill a primate. He wrote: "A soft-nosed .357 blew his lungs out. We paced the ground. The air was filled with a furious keening of his tribe. Two hundred and fifty yards. Not a bad shot." Baboons live in troops not tribes.

Plainly, the baboon was shot for copy. To write a few entertaining paragraphs for his paper. Whether it died instantly we cannot know, but certainly its "tribe" was distressed. Given that baboons are highly intelligent with a likely sentience similar to our own, what do you think? £50,000? Perhaps his paper would like to make a donation to a charity.

13 comments:

Ron Broxted said...

As one would say in my Brixton youth "He is a Ras Clart and Bomba Clart".

Anonymous said...

I stopped reading Gill after he boasted of killing the baboon. I don't buy the paper either, although I read it online for free. Apart from a few stupid Twitterers I don't think there has been a serious response to this outrage. Yet people aww all over David Attenborough documentaries. What a bunch of losers.

Anonymous said...

Couldn't someone Photoshop the baboon's head onto Gill's body and place his head on the plate?

Ron Broxted said...

Latest news:Welsh baboon kills Gill.

veritas said...

Perhaps AA Gill could do an indepth on the 'silver tsunami' craze and present himself for euthansia at a 'gentle clinic' if he wants to explore matters of life and death. MA could channel him for his copy. What a scoop!

Madame Arcati said...

An excellent suggestion Veritas. If Gill is curious to know what it's like to kill a primate, he surely is curious to experience dying, like those medical students in Flatliners.

I've heard Gill is some sort of Christian though I see little evidence, either the lack of any humility or any cxoncern for anything but himself. I could fill a whole page about his personal conduct from people who know him, but Madame Arcati is in a kindly mode.

Blithe Spirit said...

MA darling,
I have not read AA Gill’s original article, restaurant review or whatever and I don’t think I want to.

When I read your first post commenting on this matter and quoting he had shot the baboon “to find out what it feels like to kill a primate” (he should have added “in cold blood”) I thought it was despicable that AA Gill could have such shallow, senseless thoughts and still have the gall and lack of shame to share this fact with someone, let alone publish it.

Now that I read this other quote, purposely using a phrase like “blew his lungs” and then bragging about his “skill” in hitting the target at such distance reveals he relishes in making readers cringe over his actions, describing the moment as graphically as possible - Disturbing.

It is as disturbing as reading about what Geoffrey Dahmer did to animals before he went on to start killing people. If I already had the misfortune of being an acquaintance of his, I would distance myself from him as much as possible; something atrocious is always waiting to happen around people like this. He must be such and embarrassment to his kids. No comment on “the blonde”; I leave her to her fate.

Madame Arcati said...

Just as troubling is the relative lack of appropriate response, aside from a few Twitterers and charities huffing and puffing before they're distracted by a movie or whatever. A few Sunday Times readers might have grumbled about lack of taste, but I doubt Gill has lost more than a handful of readers and probably gained a few more. Perhaps even Gill himself has grown bored amid such torpor - hence his sad lapse into Hemingway territory. One can only hope Gill doesn't follow the logic of his killing curiosity and blow his brains out.

The Baboon's Ghost said...

This is actually a very serious matter. I love Gill's writing usually but I'm so upset by his shooting of the baboon that I can hardly bear to think of it. I am hoping that he did not really shoot the thing and just made it up. If it's true why isn't anyone taking it more seriously?

Madame Arcati said...

Torpor. Also, Gill has his many fans, though I don't know why. He's a smart stylist for sure, he riffs brilliantly at times, and I suppose the short distance reader likes the Sunday fix. There's nothing in it, just dexterity, just synonyms, and words he's picked up in his masturbatory submersions. Gill's bored to tears with himself, that's why he shot the baboon.

Charles Lambert said...

If a rat's worth £2,000, how much is AA Gill worth? Rather less, I suspect. Perhaps, though, if I were a baboon, or some other kind of 'primate' than the one I am, I'd be tempted to put a more substantial price on his head. Looking at the illustration to this post, I can't help but think of the final scene in the otherwise dreadful sequel to The Silence of the Lambs, in which a man tucks into his brains. That might be the most suitable punishment for Gill, though the pickings might be slim.

Christian doctrine has no respect at all for animal life, despite St Francis, Madame Arcati. You surely don't think the pope would wear rubber shoes? Heaven might not forbid - Prada would.

Madame Arcati said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Madame Arcati said...

Dear Charles - a good point about Christianity. Certainly historically it's never stopped its adherents from killing (true of all faiths), and I notice no especial concern for the animal kingdom - indeed such concern is regarded by some Christers as neo-paganistic. I have no idea what brand of Christianity Gill subscribes to, but I suspect it's the sort that comes alive on death beds.