Friday, December 08, 2006

Anna Raeburn's flying bottle

How fitting that LBC's agony aunt Anna Raeburn has become the first female commercial radio presenter to be inducted into the Radio Academy's Hall of Fame. She is indeed a splendid fast-talker, and her advice to her many problem-laden callers (termed by the production team "sad fucks") usually spot on.

It is a tribute to her charisma that even those who have fallen foul of her temper continue to hold her in high regard. Some recall the occasion at Talk Radio some years ago when a full bottle of mineral water managed to levitate into the air and fly at some considerable speed before crashing into a wall, missing certain individuals by a good few feet. Quite how this object became airborne remains a mystery but this miraculous event coincided with a tantrum by Ms Raeburn.


nsfl said...

She's a lovely neighbour and I'm glad she's back on the airwaves. There may well be a poltegeist at her workplace because no inanimate objects fly when I visit her for tea.

Arcati said...

Thank you nsfl, you appear to be very well-connected; but I seriously doubt you visit Anna for tea otherwise by now there'd be china and sugar lumps in your hair.

But carry on dreaming.

nsfl said...

My dear Madame, I have myriad faults but telling pork pies - online or elsewhere - is not among them. Ms Ray-Bans lives in the next door street to me, I promise. We first met in the newsagent. So there.

I once also had tea with Dame Barbara but to tell the extremely puerile story of that afternoon (involving the signage outside her house, where the drive forked for "House" and "Tradesmen") would out me. And you wouldn't believe me. For the record, Clive James first made the crows/Cliffs of Dover remark. It's not really a Diana-ism, is it? Babs had, when I met her, Sellotape by her ears: it was a makeshift facelift. She gave me a book which I still have somehwere - every guest got one, apparently.

While we're at it, I've met Cliff and Mr Dacre as well. But not those people who are suing each other or whatever. April Ashley? I didn't understand any of that and didn't know whom you were chanelling. Who are those people? Nor have I met Mr Vidal or Lord B of Crossharbour.

Until the daughter of an ageing bloke in a little-known south London band and Ms Raeburn are on the cover of Vanity Fair I will not describe myself as well-connected but thanks for the compliment.

I like it here, can I come again?

Arcati said...

My dear nsfl, I apologise for suggesting that you tell porkie pies, or for even hinting that you might be well-connected. I have no idea whether Clive James first dreamt up the crows/Cliffs of Dover remark of Dame Barbara's eyelashes but it has his cleverness. I'll give you that. On the other hand someone as esteemed as Kitty Kelley is happy to attribute that witticism solely to Diana in her book on the royal family - and Kitty should be beatified.

Can you tell Arcati fans anything more about Dame Anna Raeburn? (I foresee a huge honour coming to her; something more than a measly OBE or insulting MBE). Perhaps she would like to write here or give the Madame a peculiar interview. I am a fount of opportunity.

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