Thursday, December 21, 2006

Star-Fuckers' Book Guide '07 Part 1

Jan- June
One of the big star autobiographies due this year is Julie Andrews' - the current expected date of publication is Sept 13 in the UK. Rupert Everett thinks she's a "hard nut" and I know she's one of the more difficult A-listers (veteran division) to tackle in interviews.

Mid-Jan sees the release of J Randy Taraborrelli's Diana Ross: An Unauthorised Biography. This promises to be a readable haul of her various busts and bust-ups.

In February bisexual drug addict and occasional Babyshambles singer Pete Doherty publishes his Journals, scattergun diaries from 1999 to the present - perhaps similar in form to Courtney Love's recent collage of bits and pieces (which she admits she's not even read). Expect a re-ignition of his Kate Moss fandango for useful tabloid marketing purposes.

BBC Radio 2 DJ Johnnie Walker publishes The Autobiography in February (I'll be surprised), relating the drug tales that are compulsory for bookshop window space. The same month Adolf Hitler is re-visited by (of all people) Norman Mailer in The Castle In The Forest -a factional narrative that seeks to illuminate the Fuhrer's evil from a heritage perspective.

Brits will appreciate respite from Hilter with Princess of the Wags Coleen McLoughlin's Welcome To My World - a guide to her garish world of unearned riches and all because she fucks footballer Wayne Rooney.

Singer and dodgy US Pop Idol judge Paul Abdul publishes her autobiography in March as does Fidel Castro - the latter likely to be as fanciful a life story as George Galloway's recent stodgy and humourless homage to the Cuban leader.

In April David Soul, Brian Eno and The Fall's Mark E Smith cash in on their karmic voyages on this planet. In May Patti Smith tells us all about her relationship with the late outrageous artist Robert Mapplethorpe while Helen Mirren (by then Oscar-laden one hopes from the triumph of The Queen) tells all in Picture My Life.

In June Alex James of Blur fame is expected to publish Bit Of A Blur. Followers of The Independent Catherine Townsend's sex column will doubtless relish her Sleeping Around, chronicling her exploits as a cool tart.

But of course the star autobiography of mid-year is likely to be Tina Brown's The Diana Chronicles, expected June 5 from Random House. Why did the Princess of Wales think Charles was out to kill her? The former Tatler/Vanity Fair/The New Yorker editor is surely delving into the dark forces that Mohamed Al-Fayed and the Daily Express would have us think dispatched Diana and Dodi. The book is nicely timed for the 10th anniversary of Diana's death - what with the Princes' Wembley Diana rock concert planned for July 1.

Yes, another lively year in the life of publishing as books and slebrity converge ever more intimately.

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