Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Alexandra Shulman, Paul Spike and ... revenge

The UK Vogue editor Alexandra Shulman has moved her jowly chops an' size 14+ an' all into a swanky – what a ghastly word! – £2.5+m four-bedroom property in Kingswood Avenue, London. The Evening Standard's property goss Compton Miller reports that she will share the house with son Sam from ex-husband Paul Spike.

Ah, yes, Spike. His last career high was as editor of Punch back in '97. Regrettably, it fell to Madame Arcati – or her like – to end his career there when he purloined some ideas from her/him/it for the Mohamed Al-Fayed-owned satirical magazine and used them without proper credit.

Arcati took instant revenge and wrote up a fascinating lunch she/he/it had with Spike at an Italian restaurant just across the road from Harrods, during which the editor foolishly rubbished various of his colleagues such as Peter McKay (now on the Mail as Ephraim Hardcastle) and Al-Fayed himself – and even admitted he (Spike) was uncertain of the English sense of humour as a New Yorker; a somewhat terminal confession. A few days later he was fired, in the same week Diana died. He subsequently challenged the journalist Tim Satchell to a fight in the Groucho after falsely accusing him of being the author of the assassination piece – the boggled twat plainly had no recollection of his conversation with Arcati.

Some may know Spike as "Ralph Hoover", author of an appreciated novelisation of Terry Gilliam’s long-forgotten debut movie Jabberwocky. I have no idea where Spike is now though someone suggested he was running a bar on some hot island with a girlfriend. Perhaps one of my foot soldiers could enlighten me as Alexandra settles into her micro-palace.


Anonymous said...

I thought her son was called Max.

Anonymous said...

Hoots, toots ! Long forgotten indeed ! I've a mind to put you over my knee Madame A and give you a good spanking.

Madame Arcati said...

Her son from Spike is called Sam.

Duralex said...

<< I've a mind to put you over my knee Madame A and give you a good spanking. >>

He/she/it would love it !

nsfl said...

Mr Spike and Sophia Hesselgren are in Deia (see

They always used to spend half the year there anyway. Last time I saw him he was going to write a book about the Great War.

He knew Robert Graves. Graves knew everyone. My parents spent three days of their honeymoon with Graves in Deia.

I hope you are well, Madame.


Anonymous said...

wag have u people got agianst alexandra shulman ans sam spike!?!