Friday, April 03, 2009

Molly Parkin - farewell to the Green Carnation (boo hoo)


Terrible news! As if it's not awful enough that my pink trooper is turning black and blue in detention at Her Maj's Pleasure for trying to have sexual intercourse with a copper (allegedly), my fiancée Molly Parkin is giving up her Parkin Lot gig at the Green Carnation club in London's Greek Street. All the colour's draining away.

What will one do with oneself on Tuesday nights? Just how many other night owl events are being hosted by a style queen who got it together with a 23 year-old surfer boy when she was 73? Molly is a unique beast, and I am frankly appalled by her decision to quit.

It's all daughter Sophie's fault. Just cos she's gone and fallen in love and is off to Holland (or "Hollandaise Sauce Land" as Molly puts it). See, Sophie did all the arranging. The stretch limo bookings, the moozik selections (nothing post '68 - tsk), the readings and what have you - actually, I don't know if any of this is true, but it sounds right and that's all that matters on this site. So I guess Queen Molly, used to being waited on, has decided she has better things to do in Chelsea as her Cannes-bound biopic and a Croatian adventure beckon.

And what of her sexy male attendants? Roberto, the Welsh-Spanish ex-fiancé of Sophie's and his lovely composer friend, Leonardo Di Lorenzo whose horoscope I must do? And that awful squirt who goes around the club bitching about the Molly biopic (he really must be dealt with) ... will I see these gorgeous hunks ever again?

Leonardo Di Lorenzo

Still, I mustn't forget that I plan to marry Molly. Andrew Logan will tie us up sometime soon and perhaps Zandra Rhodes will be Maid of Honour. It will be a new kind of union, one rooted in art but visceral nonetheless. I reserve the right to try to seduce all of Molly's slaves, whatever their imagined orientation. And she can have her surfer boys.

Molly's last night is on Tuesday, April 7 - come and see her off to new adventures, as well as Sophie to Hollandaise Sauce Land.

Green Carnation


18 comments:

Maxim de Winter said...

I think I know that awful little squirt - failed film maker, initials RC? I had some fine evenings lost at the Carnation, it will be missed, but upwards and onwards for the Parkins!

Madame Arcati said...

I forget his name but he seemed informed on films. Told me you can't just turn up at Cannes hoping for funding. Tell that to the Marché du Film. He said he'd never heard of Molly; but that didn't stop him from attending her gig as she danced for the Welsh reality TV camera. Still, Molly gave him a verbal savaging at the door. As I walked off he was moaning to someone "That's right I'm the ugly one and you're the beautiful one, I'm always wrong etc." Yes.

Anonymous said...

She's right to quit while she's ahead.

Justin de Vere said...

Where will Madame descend next? She should host her own evenings at the Green Carnation - perhaps a nudity evening.

His Excellency Mr P.W. Waldeck said...

As The Netherlands Ambassador to the Court of St James, I must protest at your reference to Holland as "Hollandaise Sauce Land". As I said to my good wife, Cordula Quarles van Ufford, this Madame sounds a right cunt (or kut in my native land).

drf said...

How clever of you to find that clip of Angela, Madame A. We do what we can to broaden horizons.

best wishes, Duncan Fallowell

forgotten ones fund/stephmastini said...

I admire Molly...but to let such a Mad Hatter's playhouse disappear..especially now! well, that is sad...good luck Molly! sounds like love has taken precedence and she has stepped through the looking glass once again...
s!

Anonymous said...

What time does it start? I passed by at 9 one Toozdee and no one was there though people were going to the upstairs bar.

Madame Arcati said...

Warms up from about 10pm onwards.

Anonymous said...

Stop thinking about it, Madame, and do it - you can be so dizzy.

Anonymous said...

Oooh… Leonardo Di Lorenzo… yummy!…
Does Molly get along with her other daughter? Would she adopt another, please? I’m sure someone can take over Sophie’s duties and keep it up nicely. C’mon! Does anyone volunteer?

Madame Arcati said...

I'm sure Molly gets on with her other daughter, she seems very close to her family as any good Romany mum would be. I think it would be perverse not to get on with Molly to be honest. As for being her adopted daughter, she ain't Madonna! Mercy me.

Angelo Lansbury said...

Just saw your comment on Twitter about a Madame Arcati evening at the Green Carnation. I'd come. You seem nothing like Madame Arcati would appear to be at all in person, sort of weirder. So, yes, count me in.

Anonymous said...

Read through your Molly stuff. The interviews are brilliant. In one posting you were very rude about the club, had you fallen out with Molly? Or are you bipolar? It's very fashionable to be bipolar.

Anonymous said...

Well you got up in a fowl mood, I see. “ain’t Madonna”… sometimes you’re so cute, one can’t help wanting to blow raspberries in your cheeks (I’m surprised you didn’t say Brangelina). Do you think these women believe they invented “celebrities adopting foreign children“? They better learn that before them, there was Mia Farrow.

Getting on with your children hardly has to do with one being a good mum. Do you have any siblings? Because you come across oblivious to family dynamics. Plenty good parents have several children, all of whom turn out fairly well except for that one that acts more like the devil’s spawn and frequently blames mother for all their inadequacies and yes, perverse seems an appropriate adjective for one that wouldn’t get along with Molly, but it is horrible of you to immediately assume that anyone is putting blame on her or her capabilities as a family person. If they don’t get along, who know what the reasons could be.

As to Molly adopting, if you are to make good on your word to marry her, you better get used to it. She has a habit of taking under her wing smart talented people (Marty, remember?). Don’t go complaining afterwards that you had no idea that she would not devote her whole attention to you and goes around sharing her enormous golden heart with others, because we will all come to her defense and call you a cunt.

Madame Arcati said...

You sound like a loony, poppet.

forgotten ones fund/stephmastini said...

Wonderful news Molly...!
s~
MA..you took the words out of my mouth..another Anonymous loony tune..or just likes to hear themselves babble...stick to twitter love.

Anonymous said...

Oh I don’t mind at all sounding looney. Life is too short to take it too seriously and after all I’m a moonchild, it comes with the territory. Behaving a little coo-coo helps the 9 to 5 grind pass-by faster and in a more entertaining way and makes life more colorful. When I come back to work from being away even if it’s just for a day my boss and co-workers greet me like children that had been left behind to their luck, because not only most people seem incapable of resolving every day’s little “crisis” by just making a phone call, the place turns into a cemetery with boredom (as they say).

I would be far more worried if I sounded paranoid and I would be devastated if I learned I’m being snooty or too hung-up on appearances. I try to give everyone a chance to know me better and learn more about them. We have something to learn from everyone; everyone. If only people were more aware of that life would be so much more of a wonderful adventure. See? That is me being looney again.