Thursday, October 25, 2007

Closetville - a unique star-studded soap of secrets

I recently asked my rag-tag army of cultists to think up a title for my unique and ongoing post-mod Kevin Spacey/Randy Fowler/Stephanie Mastini soap opera. And I have now made a decision - it will be called Closetville.

The word closet was suggested to me by one of Randy's titles for his unpublished book (Out Of The Closet - an obvious piece of innuendo directed at Kevin). So my thanks to Randy. A labelling repackaging will take place over the next few days so that Closetville may find a wider internet audience. And who knows, maybe a TV audience in time.

Sex (cock-cocking, cock-cunting, cock-cock-cunting and other variants), glamour, beautiful artists, celebrity chauffeurs, Bill Clinton (as extra), the best European rich-bitch salons, Boise, Hollywood, glam revengers, moustachioed former porno scribe Jack Ewing (good soap name that) - and Madame Arcati! Yes, Closetville has it all.

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oooh, Madame, you're such a lad!

Anonymous said...

I would have preferred "Cloaked" given that your agenda is just that.

Anonymist said...

Riddle me this, Madame.

Is there no one else in this world that you find as fascinating as Kevin Spacey?

Or is it because only the British know who any of the other people you post about are and so only the Spacey threads get much action?

Why him of all the celebrities out there?

Why do you care about his relatives and ex-relatives and people who know his relatives and ex-relatives? It has to be more than just the train wreck that is the Randy & Stephanie Show.

When do you plan to hold the seance to make contact with his dead mother?

Madame Arcati said...

A most excellent idea Anonymist - a seance with certain of the Fowler clan would be most entertaining. It heartens me that you take such an interest in Closetville. Would you like a mention on the rolling credits?

Soap opera, as I have explained previously, works best by obsessive repetition - it's important to get familiar with the characters and to go over their lives many many times.

Anonymous said...

< When do you plan to hold the seance to make contact with his dead mother? >

A seance with his late father's spirit would be appreciated too. His version of the story might be surprising.

Anonymist said...

>it's important to get familiar with the characters and to go over their lives many many times.<

And over time, over-saturation causes viewers to lose interest.

You wouldn't want readers to think your blog is dull, now would you?

Lorenzo said...

The title coming with the end credits, that's a brand new concept. You should try to sell it to David Lynch, he might be interested.
So, Closetville, eh?
Well, as far as I'm concerned, I think it will rather be Closingville this time. You've reached my saturation point. Too much is too much. Enough is enough. Ciao!

Madame Arcati said...

No, over-saturation leads to greater interest - see every TV soap on earth.

Think of some great truth, reverse it = the truth.

Anonymous said...

"Think of some great truth, reverse it = the truth."

Mmmmmm. If so, there's many a "great truth" in your little alternative universe that will be smashed to smithereens.

Madame Arcati said...

Bye Lorenzo. Give Dinu my love!!

Duralex said...

Dinu, then Claire, and now Lorenzo ! Oh, no, please, no ! If your "ciao" means "adieu", Lorenzo, then I'm leaving too.

Madame Arcati said...

Bye Duralex. Give my love to Dinu, Claire and Lorenzo.

The Daughter-of-a-Bitch said...

Oh, poor, poor Madame, you'll feel so lonely now! Ah, well, it's payback time, I guess. Fortunately, you've activated just in time an army of charming clones who'll console you wrecked ego... :-)

Madame Arcati said...

Can you hear that lowing noise, like the ghost of a lonely cow in a foggy field. Well, it is nearly Halloween ....

Anonymous said...

As for me I can actually hear two lonely ghost cows mooing through the deserted streets of Closetville.

"The Forgotten Ones Fund"/stephanie mastini said...

...no, she doesn't need Halloween to make her the B(W)itch she truly is...F, why aren't you crocheting? you have a myriad of blogs that you invite yourself to, why here? Deny all you want..I know ...and this is the only site I write on...
I do hope Madame has kept you entertained long enough to stay off your under age boys sites.

Anonymous said...

Some mysterious interview/revelation about Kevin Spacey ? Cousins have sworn people to secrecy?

Check your wickipedia entry Madame .

Your Victorian attitude of baiting the insane admittedly has been fun but Stephanie has now taken over, having conversations with her multiple personalities on this blog and many people are finding it slightly uncomfortable.
Nobody has any 'dirt' on Spacey he just has fans that will rise to your taunts and provide your blog with a bit more profile.

The net is closing in ........

Anonymous said...

>> Check your wickipedia entry Madame <<

Ah. Here is someone who reads the right message boards.

Anonymous said...

And a very interesting read it is too.....

Madame Arcati said...

How kind of you. It's so reassuring to encounter someone who appreciates my attempts to heighten human experience, even if I sometimes feel like the ... phantom at the opera ...

Anonymous said...

Oh God you are even starting to sound like Mastini now....

"The Forgotten Ones Fund"/stephanie mastini said...

Madame, is here any way we can exorcise her on "Closetville?"

Anonymous said...

"I sometimes feel like the ... phantom at the opera ..."

You'll be the phantom of your own soap opera now. No curtain calls. Don't rest in peace, Clover Vitriol. :-)