I have already written about the Telegraph's wretched gossip writer Celia Walden (aka Piers Morgan’s girlfriend). As regular readers of this site know, I’m not one to go on (and on etc), and I do believe in giving subjects of my interest a chance to redeem themselves. I have given Celia a chance to improve her act after an adverse review of a selection of her “exclusives” several weeks ago, and today, on impulse, I returned to her column. Alas! Would Celia know what gossip is if it smacked her on the fanny? Let’s go through today’s crock of tales:
Beckham to get his own reality TV show! Yes, but this story saw the light of day early Tuesday morning, dear. Celia quotes a TV source as if he’d whispered this intelligence into her actual shell-likes. In fact these whispered revelations first appeared in the TV trades.
Cricketer Monty Panesar spends Monday evening with David Cameron! Gossip indeed. Celia “gathers that Cameron was overheard laughingly calling Monty the acceptable face of spin.” The same quote couldn’t possibly have been lifted from this blog item [click here] posted yesterday, by any chance?
Tony Blair holds a Labour whips bye bye party at No 10 – even “disloyal” Tom Watson turns up! OK, so did the canapés, presumably. Celia digs up an old Tony quote on Tom to fill space.
The cover of Lewis Croft’s The Pornographer of Vienna features a knickerless woman and is upsetting at least one unnamed commenter on the Waterstone’s website! Well, fuck me!
Liberal MP Lembit Opik wants to teach girlfriend Cheeky Girl Gabriela Irimia how to fly! I know! He told Fern Brittan and Phillip Schofield on This Morning last week. How people repeat themselves!