July 4, 2006 - this is when Madame Arcati emerged from her amniotic crystal womb in perfect form; no hideous childhood to endure, no memoirs to look forward to. How many prodigies do you know who at the age of 1 can so entrance the globe with such wit and wisdom as mine - and exclusive information? It quite makes me think that perhaps there is such a thing as reincarnation. I sometimes wonder who I might have been in another age. Don't you wonder too? Why don't you plug into the timeless organ of your soul-mind and send me your suggestions.
Naturally, I shall think of something to celebrate my birthday, something that combines my unparalleled ability to piss off and inform all at once. Yes, I think I know what I'll do ... but I must not get self-parodic ... one must watch for signs of ageing ...
5 comments:
"I sometimes wonder whom I might have been in another age. Don't you wonder too?"
No. You've been a woodlouse without the shadow of a doubt. Its favourite place is the bog.
"Yes, I think I know what I'll do ... "
An interview with your real you? Nothing would be more thrilling than that, don't you think!
Thank you Bitch, I do adore woodlice, poor little mites. They are the bison of our gardens.
An interview with the real me ... mmm, that could quite cacophonous. Think the Borg ...
I have long since suspected that – like God ;-) – Arcati might be several persons. A closer look would help give some evidence about it...
> something that combines my unparalleled ability to piss off and inform all at once
If so, we already know the tired victim, and your birthday candle will be a wet firecracker. Find something else, for your own sake. Fresh, young blood, something really wicked, please.
Born on the fourth of July! Born Again as the fearless hostess of moderated comment on June 25, 2007. You must be so proud. I wonder if your own comment will be moderate as a result. Will you still post pictures of unfeasibly large dicks? Will you still speculate on the personal habits of TV news presenters? Will you continue to expound on the anthropology of cock-cunting? We can only pray.
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