Thursday, September 27, 2007

Derek Acorah Holidays! Robbie Williams Approved!

The twat-lipped clairvoyant medium Derek Acorah – sacked even from Living’s ludicrous Most Haunted for charlatanism - has thought up another wheeze to make money from the living and the dead.

Now you can buy yourself “a spa break with Derek Acorah” for a “Spirits in the Sun” holiday. “Britain’s best known celebrity medium Derek Acorah will be appearing amidst a whole weekend of paranormal experts, at a renowned 4 star Spa hotel complex on the Costa Del Sol, Andalucia, Spain, [in November]” runs the brochure, click here for more. Well, the ear-studded fraud has to top up his leathery hide tan, I guess, to match the gold highlights in his gelled barnet (love to see the state of his pillows). Very cheekily and disingenuously, he boasts “conducting consultations” with various showbiz stars such as the likes of Robbie Williams. Oooh dear, that’s not wise …

Back in October 2005, The Times ran a fantastic interview with the Robster by Caitlin Moran. He told how he’d been so impressed by Acorah (presumably on Most Haunted) that he summoned him to his Chelsea Harbour penthouse for a psychic sitting. “However, when pressed by Williams to 'go on and do it' — contact the dead — Acorah came up with little more than what a search would yield on Williams’s dead relatives, albeit rendered in a blaze of peerlessly camp Scouse dramatics."

Robbie wisely ushered the psychic hustler out the door, but you can’t keep a professional con down for long. Soon Acorah was on the phone to Robbie trying to inveigle him into doing a Living TV show oblivious of the fact that Robbie has only to fart and ABC would be on the line. Then Acorah invited Robbie to a dinner with him and his pal ... Uri Geller – that too was met with a polite non-attendance. The piece continues:

“I thought, I’m not talking to you, you ****ing idiot. You’re outside the circle of trust. Next thing I know,” Williams says, rattling his belt buckle with his knuckles in a surge of nervous energy, “he’s promoting a DVD in a double-page spread in the Daily Mirror, going “Yeah, I got (contacted on ‘the other side’) Robbie’s nan. And when Robbie’s in America, his friends watch my DVD. Robert de Niro, Robin Williams, Dustin Hoffman.”

Robbie does a face of scandalised boggling.

“I’VE NEVER MET THEM!” he shouts, slowly, as if communicating with a deaf idiot on the other side of the Thames. “I DON’T KNOW DUSTIN HOFFMAN! And hang on a minute — YOU’RE ALSO SELLING A DVD USING MY DEAD NAN!" Robbie sighs.

Do read the whole of the interview, one of the best celebrity media encounters I have ever read. Click here


Anonymous said...

Can't we drop the trash margins for a bit? Bring back Lavinia!

Madame Arcati said...

Lavinia is a free agent, she comes and she goes. Arcati is a free agent too and writes about whatever interests her.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.